Let's Get Uncomfortable

My heart crept up into my throat as we pulled out of the driveway. The same way it always does when I'm leaving. I kept focusing on a few hours from now when I would be settled back in, laundry put away, bed made up with clean sheets, and most likely out gallivanting around my neighborhood. I kept that thought in my mind until the feeling dissipated.

I've just finished two weeks of spending time with my family, outside of the city. Let me paint you a picture: it's a picturesque small town where you can't go anywhere without seeing someone you know. There are grassy parks where kids are playing soccer, and a town swimming pool that families congregate to on the weekends. The Fourth of July is taken with extreme seriousness, and there are three churches within one square mile. I spend my days in an air-conditioned, quiet, inviting space where there is a stocked fridge and cable television. In multiple rooms. I can walk around without socks on and not fear the dirt that is caking onto my skin. It is clean beyond clean. I get to drive with the windows down and music playing as loud as I want to, and I am usually en route to either my best friend's house, the Target that is but five minutes away, or the beach where I'll be greeted by more people that love me. Also, did I mention there is air-conditioning?

It is good, my friends. It. Is. Good.

Add to all of this awesomeness that I'm with my mom, who is my absolute best girl and favorite person to lounge around doing nothing with, and my two sweet baby doggies who are out of their mind happy with the space they have to play in, and their non-city walks full of beautiful grass to roll their doggie selves around in. And I am blessed beyond belief to be able to work from anywhere I am so location doesn't matter.

So you might be saying to yourself by now, "well Kerry, if it's so great, why don't you just stay there?". And to that I would say believe you me I have thought about it. But here's the kicker: just because something is comfortable, does not mean it is right for you.

One more time: just because something is comfortable, does not mean it is right for you.

This thought usually makes me groan and roll my eyes, but it's true. I know that right now I must be in New York City. That's it. I just know. If you know me in real life, you hear me talking lustfully about Los Angeles all the time. Guess what? If I was supposed to be in LA, I would be. It really is that simple. Right now, I'm supposed to be in New York City. If that changes or if I feel called elsewhere, then so it goes.

Sometimes this gives people a bit of a challenge because I can't exactly formulate why I need to be here except just that I do. And my friends, my beautiful souls, let me tell you something: just knowing where you need to be is enough of a reason to be there. (Unless, of course, you're, like, hurting someone or someone is hurting you, in which case you go on ahead and back the heck out of there right now.)

We can apply this to everything. Where you live, who you live with, how you spend your time, what you are doing with your life, what you want to be doing, and whom you choose to love. If you feel comfortable in your job but long to be doing something entirely different then it is time to make a move. If you feel comfortable in your relationship but feel more content then you feel in love, look into that. If you want to move to a city that you've never even been to, just because you feel like you are supposed to or something pinged in your brain when you heard of it the first time, then sweetheart, start packing. Don't waste your time worrying about what you may lose in your comfortable life. The things that will be waiting for you there will be so much better you can't even imagine them now.

Friends, I want to be clear here: being comfortable is not a sign that something is askew. You can absolutely be comfortable and happy at the same time. Just because you're comfortable in your relationship, doesn't mean it's time to break up. I'm talking about the kind of comfortable where we're keeping ourselves somewhere or in something just because it feels safe. Just because the fear of the unknown outweighs the fear of staying in something kind of so-so. That's where the red flags live. And the good news is when something is meant for us, we always get it. So maybe you do leave the comfortable, safe relationship for awhile. If you're meant to be with that person you'll find your way back around to them. Just how it works.

I'm back in the city now, with grime on my feet and my gloriously not air-conditioned apartment (send fans). Within an hour of being back, I found myself with exciting auditions and plans for the week, that seemingly came out of nowhere. Without a doubt, when we listen to ourselves, we are rewarded for being brave and trusting the calm, steady voice that guides us. 

What are you feeling too comfortable with? What kind of change would you make if you weren't afraid?

Happy Monday, friends. Go get those dreams.

Red, White & Blue Revisited

With the Fourth of July quickly approaching (you know, like, tomorrow), I'm taking a quick look back at last year's celebration and sharing the easiest, fastest holiday treat to make. Bring this bad boy to your barbecue, picnic, or pool party this year and you'll look super fancy while secretly knowing you are not. Don't worry, secret's safe with me.

Last year was a banner year for my 4th. Morning parade with my family, finally being grown up enough to bring something with me to a party, enjoying the afternoon with friends before taking a break to check in with my three favorite people whom I wasn't able to see that day (yes, two of those people have paws), back to the party and then fireworks to finish off the day. Classic July 4th.

Okay ready for the 'recipe'? It has 5 very important steps:
1. Get many cartons of blueberries, blackberries, strawberries, and raspberries (bonus points if you can spell raspberries without spellcheck. Cause I couldn't. Both times.).
2. Rinse them off thoroughly.
3. Find some sort of circular serving dish and begin arranging the fruit, working your way from the outside in.
4. Make whatever fancypants pattern that suits you.
5. Win at 4th of July food. Done! Bam. Easy.

I'll have you know I did not see this on pinterest and copy it, but instead, combined my outstanding procrastination skills with whatever was left at the grocery store with my artistic talents (aka panic) and created this here beauty. Between this fruit platter and the fact that I wore a dress as a skirt, well, I was quite delighted with myself.

I hope whatever you're doing this year (or, maybe, not doing - hey there couch and marathons of tv, how are you?) brings you total joy. And delicious snacks.

Beach Baby, Your Inner Weirdo & #GIRLBOSS

I think there's something you should know about me. I love Mondays. There! I said it. Secret's out.

Mondays excite and invigorate me. I get more done on Monday than any other day of the week, and most importantly, I get it done while feeling enthused and motivated and inspired. I know there's this cult feeling about Mondays that they suck, right? I've seen your pinterests, instagrams and facebook posts about it. If where you're heading on Monday morning, or what you're up to, does not make you want to throw confetti and have dance parties, then take that as a sign to start deciding what does make you want to throw a party to solely celebrate the start of the work week. And then start moving toward that.

Here's something else you should know about me: I love the beach. Oh I love it so much! I'm open to any and all beaches, and have enjoyed sand all up in my life everywhere from California beaches to Florida beaches to Maine beaches, with many in between. But I will tell you what, and this is coming from a girl who seriously loves the Pacific Coast (SoCal! NorCal! The NorthWest! and I don't mean Kayne's baby!) and Florida (summer thunderstorms are my favorite and Florida does warm rain right), there ain't no place like the Jersey Shore.

Am I completely biased? Yes. Did I grow up on these beaches? Yes. Does my Aunt have a home that I sneak off to as much as possible in the summer? Yes. But this is my blog so my biased butt is claiming Jersey beaches to be the best.

While soaking up rays this weekend, I finally joined the bandwagon and began to read #GIRLBOSS. This book is no joke. Sophia Amoruso went from being flat broke, unemployed, uninsured, and virtually doing nothing with her life to running the $150 million dollar brand and shop that we know and love as Nasty Gal. All in less than 8 years. Plus, girlfriend is 30. She's basically a newborn in the business world, and has no formal business training.

She blended listening to herself, trusting her gut, staying authentic to herself, and just doing the damn thing (aka taking action) into the most delicious life cocktail ever.

The reason I read books like this is to remind myself that not only is it doable but that my weird, artsy, non-rule following, dream chasing, action taking self is actually wonderfully made for greatness. There is something super weird about me that makes me a brilliant business owner and creative freak. Many days I pick on myself about these qualities, and I'm even known to whine about how I wish I was 'normal' (doesn't exist) once in awhile. But at the end of the day, I'm super stoked to be able to read a book like this and not even flinch when she mentions finding people and items off of Craigslist, hiring employees from things like Instagram feeds, and taking risk after risk. If this is the kind of place being weird takes me, then heck yes. Bring it on.

And this is true for all of us. We all have special things about us that make us exactly the right fit for the kind of life we desire. Isn't that so cool? You are already equipped with personality traits, quirks, and fascinating thoughts or skills that align with your greatness. It's just a matter of whether or not you choose to shove them aside, hide them in fear or doubt, or grab hold of them like they are the last bottle of coconut water and it is hotter than hell outside, waving them around in the air shouting 'look what I have, look what I have!'.

So, friends, I come to you with two questions:
1. Does Monday make you want to wear a cape, pop on a tiara, and eat cake for breakfast?
2. How can you use your unique qualities to better your life and go after your dreams?

While you're leaving your answers in the comments, tell me where your favorite beach is, k? Cool, love you, mean it, peace out beach bums.

Choosing Your Train Car

When the train slowly came to a halt and it's doors opened, we all piled on as per usual. In less than two seconds, deep sighs were heard as we all simultaneously realized the air conditioning was not working on this particular car of the train. There were words muttered under breath, curses, and general displeasure as every one began to sweat.

Here's where it gets interesting: as the train pulled up to the next station, I noticed most people taking a seat and accepting the gross, starting-to-smell, frustrated car they happened to choose that day. And I noticed this while I walked off of it and on to the car next to us. Which was delightfully air conditioned.

I couldn't help but make the connection to life. Why do we keep ourselves on the smelly, gross, hot car when there is a perfectly wonderful, cool, inviting car next to us? Is it fear that we'll go to the next car and it will be even worse? Is it self-pity taking charge, letting us be all "woe is me" for the moment? Is it classic self-sabotage saying we clearly can't have it all and must suffer? I'm not sure, but whatever it is, it's pretty silly.

You are meant for a life of awesome, not a life filled with settling for whatever you happened to stumble upon. That particular car is not your fate, it's just the car you happened to walk onto. Struggle, suffering, frustration, disappointment and anger are not your truth, it's just what you happen to stumble into from time to time. You are able, at any point, to get off of the car you are currently stuck on and move to one where you're happier.

So, are you keeping yourself on a smelly, sad, frustrated car on the train of life? Or are you perusing all of them until you find one that works best for you?

Enjoy your weekend, friends :)

Be It

photo by katie rain photography

You are going to have days where you want to do nothing. That's okay, embrace it.

There are going to be times where you want to spend the entire day in bed, lounging and watching terrible reality tv shows. That's okay, indulge in it.

There are going to be nights where you can't get your work done no matter how much you force yourself to keep typing. That's okay, release it.

There are going to be times where you're being unbearably hard on yourself to finish, or start, something. That's okay, forgive it.

You are going to look at your to-do list, and look to your running shoes, and look to your couch, and find yourself ignoring both the list and the shoes. That's okay, revel in it.

We are not here to get everything done or be the most productive human beings possible.
We're here to enjoy the experience. And sometimes, enjoying the experience of life means doing very little else except being. That's okay, be it.

Mustard Seed Sessions: Interview with Stephanie of The Loudmouth Lifestyle

I'm so excited to share this interview with Stephanie Shar from The Loudmouth! Steph is bold, talented, and carving out a path for herself in one of my favorite cities, Los Angeles. 

Make sure to check out her blog, instagram, and e-book to get more Steph in your life!

1. What's a day in your life like?

As a writer/blogger/shop owner/aspiring model/soon-to-be consultant, every day is a little different!  But, it goes something like this... I usually wake around 7 or 8 when my boyfriend gets up for work, and I don't actually start anything serious until 9. During these early morning hours, I take my time eating breakfast while checking my phone, social media, email and my favorite blogs. I try to respond to everything ASAP so that I don't forget, because I tend to do that.  After that I'll normally work on something easy like a just-for-fun post, link roundup or guest post. Around 11 I really get down to business, and then in the afternoon I'll take a long break to nap, take a walk or run errands.  If I just stay in the house all day on my computer, I get crazy.  I go back to writing around 4 and work diligently until 8.  After that I'll read, hang out with the boyf and relax.  Now that I'm pregnant I get tired super early and usually head to bed around 9 or 10!  I wrote all about my daily schedule here.

2. What prompted you to start your blog?

I've wanted to write for a living since I was 7, but I never knew exactly what to write.  I went from short stories and poetry, to novels, to scripts and sketches.  I finally discovered blogging in 2010 and started The Loudmouth Lifestyle, which started as a fashion blog, but now focuses on self-help, self-love and living to the fullest!  It's the perfect place to fulfill my goals of inspiring and empowering women, and I've recently begun writing e-books as well.

3. Is your business/blog your full time job? If not, what else do you do? If yes, how long were you doing it before it became full time?

I am proud to say that it's now my full-time job, though getting to this point hasn't been easy!  I've been publicly blogging since 2010, but I've been writing in general for the last 20 years!

4. What would you tell your 20-year old self?

I would tell her to get cracking on your dreams sooner than later. :) I don't think it's ever too late, though sometimes I do wish I had started earlier.  I just didn't have the confidence. 

5. What's the worst job you've ever had?

Fortunately, my past jobs haven't been too bad, but I have had to deal with some mean bosses.  One of them was sexist, racist and wouldn't give us breaks.  He also almost fired me for wearing jewelry with my uniform.  Now, I get to wear sweatpants and eat at my computer!

6. What's the best piece of advice you've ever gotten?

It was from my dad. I was a teenager and I had a huge crush on a boy that didn't give two shits about me. My dad told me, “don't ever put more effort into a relationship than the other person.” Even though he said those words so long ago, I learned that on my own, over and over again, the hard way. I am the type of person who sometime cares TOO much about other people and can forget about myself. I've become more selfish, in a good way. You need to have a healthy balance of love for yourself and others. This can be applied to business, too -- if you have a business partner and you're putting in more effort than they, something needs to change.

7. What's the hardest part about pursuing a "non-traditional" career? The best part?

The hardest part, for me, is the fact that most of my friends and family are more traditional.  A lot of them don't really "get" what I'm doing and it's difficult to explain or earn their support.  I've always been a pretty independent person, and that's been really helpful in starting my own business, since I don't have a team backing me up.  That leads me to the next question -- I love working for myself!  Though I plan to someday higher a photographer, videographer, and office assistant, it's not possible right now and I am totally okay with that.  I'm learning a lot and having fun and I'm always busy, which is so fulfilling.

8. What inspires you?

Other blogs and books, and getting offline!  I usually find the most inspiration when I'm traveling or exploring my own city.  Immersing yourself in a different environment is so refreshing and I always come back to my work with new ideas.

Fiddler, Friends & Features

You may have noticed a little absence here on le blog. That's due in part to lots of exciting things going on, including this little bit of news!

I am so excited to be performing at "Raising The Roof", a gala to celebrate the 50th Anniversary of Fiddler On The Roof. Getting to be reunited with so many of the people that shaped my life as both a person and an actor, and getting to work among such legends, is amazing and unreal to me! 

There are a few tickets left for the event on June 9th at Town Hall in NYC. You can find more info and buy tickets here.

There are some very cool articles with amazing stories that you can see here and here.

I've also recently popped up on this blog (make sure to check out her style! so good), and in this Mother's Day post (warning: adorable baby photo of me is included).

Say it with me now: TRADITION!